Does this sound like you?
- I’ve made mistakes before, so I don’t trust my own decisions.
- I’m unclear and then miss out on excellent opportunities because I can’t decide what to do.
- I get ‘freaked-out’ by all the details and then I don’t take action on my decisions.
So many people I’ve coached told me they’ve missed out on countless opportunities in life because they had difficulty making up their minds. One woman came to me for coaching because she said: “although I’ve accomplished a lot, I still have trouble taking my business to the next level”. Soon after working together, she revealed that in the past, she decided to lend a very substantial amount of money to a friend for a business idea. She said: “It sounded like a good investment at the time, but I didn’t get all the details I should have before dishing out all that money.” In the end, she lost all of her investment money. If that wasn’t painful enough, her friend skipped town and never repaid her. Even though this was several years ago, the experience seriously affected her confidence in her decision-making abilities. In this case, the emotional pain that went along with the decision she’d made many years ago regarding her finances was keeping her from expanding her business and tripling her income. After we worked through this, she felt like a “weight was lifted” and said she “could finally feel confident” in her ability to make decisions in her personal and professional life. Now her business is thriving, and she feels happy and fulfilled.
I’ve also missed out on things because I procrastinated on making decisions for one reason or another but now I can feel confident because I have a simple method to follow to make decisions.
Here’s my advice:
When you’re faced with a decision, the first thing is to be crystal clear on your goals.
- Think about return on investment-think: “ Will it bring me more business, will it make my life easier in some way, or will I make more money?” Rule of thumb here is that if it doesn’t give me at least 100% return on my investment of time and energy or it doesn’t contribute to my wellbeing in a big way-it’s a NO!
- Consider the alternative if you don’t take the opportunity. In other words, what will or could happen if you don’t that the chance? Maybe if you don’t say yes, it will free up more time to work on a new project you’ve started or give you more time with your family.
- Consult your INNER GUIDANCE system. Get quiet, and still and tune into your feelings. I describe it as a “yum” or a “yuck” feeling. Try it set a timer for two minutes and then sit quietly with your eyes closed. Then think of something/someone you love. After the two minutes write down how you felt. How did your body feel? Did you notice warmth anywhere, any sensations? Was there a smile on your face as you were thinking of that person or thing? This feeling is a “yum” or a “HELL YES!” Now, set your timer again for two minutes and repeat the exercise while thinking of something you don’t like. After the two minutes record, how you felt. Notice where you feel it, is warm, cold, prickly? This feeling is a “yuck” or a “HELL NO.” So, when you’re faced with a decision check in with yourself Remember the “yum” and “yuck” feelings this is your internal guidance system at work. Sometimes it takes a while to learn to trust yourself, it takes courage, but try to have faith in your instincts and your inner wisdom.
Often clarity gets in the way of our decision-making. If you feel like you lack clarity in some area, I can help you. Contact me for a complimentary assessment conversation. Together, we’ll create a customized plan of action for you to become your personal and professional best. It’s completely FREE with no obligations.